Tag Archives: north american football

The NFL is here and it’s gloriously fucked up already

There’s just something about the NFL. Something about setting aside three hours of your time for two hours of commercials followed by an hour’s worth of actual play chronically interrupted by referees rendered helpless now that they cannot properly decide what genuinely constitutes a catch (a sad fact that even needs to be debated in the first place). The NFL semi-officially kicks off with the Hall of Fame week, where we have the inagural game that doesn’t mean anything, a bout between the Dallas Cowboys and Arizona Cardinal’s B-squads.

Granted, I know we’re talking about pre-season here but boy, shitty things have happened already. I’m not even going to touch the offseason stuff, I’m talking about since the doors opened for business.

  • Miami Dolphins quarterback Ryan Tannehill is, at least as of now, out for the season thanks to an already damaged ACL now a totally being damaged ACL. Tannehill is seeking a second opinion and the team refuses to say he’s totally done. However injuries like this rarely end well, so it’s fair to say Tannehill is off the table.


  • Things are somewhat dysfunctional within the Seattle Seahawks camp, with pass-rusher Frank Clark instigating a fight with offensive lineman Germain Ifedi. According to sports reporter Gregg Bell via Twitter,

You’re likely either excited these guys are so eager to get violent with each other so soon, or your disappointed they’re eager to get violent with each other so soon.

  • Speaking of Cowboys, the first NFL pre-season game wrapped up with a 20-18 victory over the Arizona Cardinals. Dallas backup QBs Kellen Moore and Cooper Rush both logged touchdowns, with receptions by TE Rico Gathers and WR Uzoma Nwachukwu.
  • New York Jets owner Woody Johnson has been named U.S. ambassador to the U.K., who will most assuredly attempted to push more sub-par North American football teams (coughJetscough) onto unsuspecting Britons. You poor bastards.

Race to Super Bowl LI

It feels like it was only yesterday we saw Peyton Manning in Super Bowl 50 with a dominant Denver Broncos defense taking their big win. We are now only a couple of weeks away from Super Bowl 51 and the race for the playoffs has gotten even more intense. I’ve been wondering who will make it with New England standing tall in the AFC, especially with contending Raiders losing QB Derek Carr for the season and Kansas City stalling these last few weeks. The NFC is burning with the Cowboys rolling on a two game win streak heading into a bye week, while the Seahawks, Falcons and Packers are clawing to keep their hopes alive. Green Bay can also thank a decaying Lions team who will be fighting for their lives on New Years Day against a confident Aaron Rodgers.
I’m going to be upfront, I think the Patriots will lock this year down with a disappointing win on par with Trump(Too much?, I dunno). They are playing like they’ve already won it. However you can’t count out the Falcons, Seahawks, or even the Raiders quite just yet. The Seahawks are playoff bound but not quite comfortably. If they want a first round bye, they’ll have to beat San Francisco which likely won’t be so hard. As for the Green Bay, they’re clutch when determined and it’s been proven again this season. They’re annoying as hell, but you can’t ignore their tenacity. Rodgers is showing why he is an MVP. Then there’s the Falcons, who come in with a 10-5 record, striving for that elusive playoff win that has been haunting them.
Finally we have the entertaining Dallas Cowboys who can’t be talked up enough. Their superstar rookies Dak Prescott and Ezekiel Elliot have been nothing short of ridiculous. There is the storyline of the passing of the torch in less than deserving ways as Tony Romo was forcibly removed by injury in preseason. There is no team hotter in the NFL than the Dallas Cowboys, whether you’d like to hear that or not. They are the NFC’s leading contender and there looks like no sign of them stopping.
• Patriots/Cowboys
• Patriots/Seahawks
• Patriots/Falcons
• Patriots/Packers
• Raiders/Cowboys
• Steelers/Seahawks